Trip to Tall Emu/OA HQ

Discussion in 'other software & services' started by Longboard, Dec 1, 2009.

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  1. Longboard

    Longboard Registered Member

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    So I finally girded the loins and made the journey to Tall Emu HQ here in Sinney.
    I was so excited.
    :)

    Ardous journey.
    Frightening trip to the edges of reality.
    Think Conrad and Kurtz.

    Days of rough trekking through the urban jungle, nearly died of dehydration and snake bites ( twice), porters dropping dead of bizarre tropical diseases.
    Finally gained entrance to the inner sanctum: strip searched by 300lb samoans.
    The boss sitting there with winsome maidens serving cold ales: in extremely skimpy ( and I use the term guardedly) clothing. :eek:
    The 300 worker bees tied to their desks with barbed wire: shocking I tell you.
    Acres of warehoused $1 per sweatshop software slaves.
    No food or drink breaks for the peons: just endless coding and collating and a touch of the lash as required.
    Thousands of illegally connected high end servers buzzing in the background chomping our national bandwidth to bits.

    Head spinning with the terrifying reality of it all.

    Lording over it all : Mike Nash a true web despot; carving out a Kingdom in the brutal reality of software competition.
    Covered in tatts. Dreadlocks. Throne encrusted with fresh human skulls. Slugging straight JD at an inhuman rate.
    A terrifying sight.

    "Money, need more money, beer, slaves and grrls", he mumbles .
    "Send out the pressgangs for more workers: promise them real wages" he cackles as his broker calls with the next megabuck real estate deal.
    On the phone: "Zat you Gatesy ??, you want wot? A loan. Nah, too busy to see you this week, piss off back to Seattle or wherever. "

    So: I actually did go to visit mike and the gang at Tall Emu: had a great chat met the real brains behind the operation. :D
    Mikes' hardly geeky at all. ;)
    Lots of exciting stuff coming down the pipe at TE.
    Even got me a rare boxed edition of OA.
    Nice of TE to have me.
    Interesting for me to see a serious web biz in action.
    Got some upfront insights into the intricacies of marketing and development.
    Mike Tells me the EMSI big boys might be visiting downunder soon.
    maybe I'll get a chance to rub shoulders with real software makers.
    :D

    Thanks to Mike for letting me have a poke around. :) :thumb:
    regards

    PS:They need a proper coffee machine.
    LOL
     
  2. twl845

    twl845 Registered Member

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    Did they take you out for lunch? :D
     
  3. Longboard

    Longboard Registered Member

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    Mouldy bread and some dripping. :D
     
  4. Meriadoc

    Meriadoc Registered Member

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    Sounded a good excursion lol
     
  5. Peter2150

    Peter2150 Global Moderator

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    Hi Longboard

    Have you signed up for a creative writing course by chance?:D

    I am jealous you got to meet the team. Must have been fun.

    Pete
     
  6. Longboard

    Longboard Registered Member

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    Absolute truth all of it. :shifty:
    Mike was very generous.
    I'm on $1 per word, heh heh.
     
  7. chrome_sturmen

    chrome_sturmen Registered Member

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    Very cool Longboard:D

    I've often wondered at the mythical sparkling, golden brews horded in their multitudes at the Tall emu headquarters, as well as the renowned skimpily clad guilded, nubile females said to roam the premises in copious amounts - i'm truly most envious :( :mad:

    Online Armor is a top notch product and Mike is a top notch guy - he's always been generous and friendly in any correspondence I've had with him :thumb:

    Here's to your next visit:thumb:
     
  8. MikeNash

    MikeNash Security Expert

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    It is really disappointing when you invite someone to your office for a serious visit and you see something like this.

    Longboard's report contains a number of matters that I feel need to be addressed immediately, lest people get the wrong idea about our business. I know there is a place for fun, but this is not it.

    The suggestion that I sit on a throne encrusted with skulls is ridiculous. As is the part about the winsome maidens, but some people will believe anything and the OP should know better.

    To clarify - I sit on a normal office chair, and the skull-encrusted throne is only used when I receive visitors... and as for the "The boss sitting there with winsome maidens serving cold ales: in extremely skimpy ( and I use the term guardedly) clothing."

    I certainly was not wearing skimpy clothing, at least, not compared to the maidens.


    Mike
     
  9. NAMOR

    NAMOR Registered Member

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    That's really cool that the let you visit the Mother ship. Any pics you can share?
     
  10. Page42

    Page42 Registered Member

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    LOL Mike. I'll admit it, you had me going as I read the first half of your post. I thought you were serious. :D
     
  11. MikeNash

    MikeNash Security Expert

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    :D I couldn't resist :)
     
  12. tsec

    tsec Registered Member

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    Nice thread to read on a Friday morning - made me smile :):thumb:
     
  13. Fajo

    Fajo Registered Member

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    Ok I needed this. Thanks for the laugh :D
     
  14. firzen771

    firzen771 Registered Member

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    lol ye the begging of what Mike was typing almost got me to :D :D
     
  15. Longboard

    Longboard Registered Member

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    Hmm, notice: no real denials, just the punctuation :D :D
    The thought of MN in skimpy clothing makes my blood run cold..
    LOL
     
  16. Pinga

    Pinga Registered Member

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    Pray tell?!
     
  17. MikeNash

    MikeNash Security Expert

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    I kinda swore him to secrecy on that
     
  18. beethoven

    beethoven Registered Member

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    I think now I don't know what to believe - we have one story by Longboard - and why would he make this up :rolleyes: - and typically for this situation a denial by the cold-hearted capitalist- hardly proves anything.

    I second Namor's request - Pictures please
     
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