Need Decent One Liners Please

Discussion in 'ten-forward' started by MICRO, Sep 7, 2004.

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  1. JimIT

    JimIT Registered Member

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    My mother never breast-fed me. She told me she liked me as a friend.
    --Rodney Dangerfield
     
    JimIT, Sep 8, 2004
    #101
  2. mismis29

    mismis29 Registered Member

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    *My signature* ;)
     
    mismis29, Sep 8, 2004
    #102
  3. Rita

    Rita Infrequent Poster

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    a stitch in time saves nine--what?
     
    Rita, Sep 8, 2004
    #103
  4. Rita

    Rita Infrequent Poster

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    Are you telling the truth if you lie in bed
     
    Rita, Sep 8, 2004
    #104
  5. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    The early bird may get the worm, but it's the 2nd Mouse that gets the cheese !
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #105
  6. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    It's not the Despair - I can stand the Despair, It's the Hope !
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #106
  7. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    Beggars can be choosers by doing a bit of shoplifting !
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #107
  8. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    Treat contempt with kindness -
    Only a bloody fool treats kindness with contempt.
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #108
  9. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    Questions may always be answered, but answers should always be questioned.
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #109
  10. Rita

    Rita Infrequent Poster

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    Genius aint anything more than elegant common sense
     
    Rita, Sep 8, 2004
    #110
  11. ronjor

    ronjor Global Moderator

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    I bought some powdered water once
    ... but I didn't know what to add

    Steven Wright
     
    ronjor, Sep 8, 2004
    #111
  12. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    Girls when they went out to swim
    once dressed like Mother Hubbard.
    Now they have a bolder whim
    and dress more like her cupboard.
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #112
  13. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    Wine improves with age - the older I get the more I like it.
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #113
  14. MICRO

    MICRO Registered Member

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    When the power of Love overcomes the Love of power -
    we will have a chance.
     
    MICRO, Sep 8, 2004
    #114
  15. bigc73542

    bigc73542 Retired Moderator

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    A bee could travel 4 million miles (6.5 million km) at 7 mph (11 km/h) on the energy it would obtain from 1 gallon (3.785 liters) of nectar.
     
    bigc73542, Sep 8, 2004
    #115
  16. Peaches4U

    Peaches4U Registered Member

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    the nice thing about being senile is that u can hide ur own easter eggs.
     
    Peaches4U, Sep 8, 2004
    #116
  17. Peaches4U

    Peaches4U Registered Member

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    Pizza shop sign - 7 days without a pizza makes one weak.
     
    Peaches4U, Sep 8, 2004
    #117
  18. Peaches4U

    Peaches4U Registered Member

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    sign seen on a plumber's truck - " we repair what ur husband fixed." " Don't sleep with a drip - call ur plumber".
     
    Peaches4U, Sep 8, 2004
    #118
  19. Peaches4U

    Peaches4U Registered Member

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    inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened!
     
    Peaches4U, Sep 8, 2004
    #119
  20. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: never assume things its the mother load to all f@#$ up's
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #120
  21. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: even budah only forgives three times "click" BANG!
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #121
  22. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: Be careful with the guns there a gift from the devill
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #122
  23. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: Dont pist me off im runing out of places to stash bodies
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #123
  24. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: your soul may belong to god but your a$$ belongs to me
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #124
  25. Mr.Blaze

    Mr.Blaze The Newbie Welcome Wagon

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    :cool: forgiveness is an aquired taste to bad i aint got a taste for it.

    blaze duping dirt in a freeshly made shallow grave :D
     
    Mr.Blaze, Sep 9, 2004
    #125
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