joke of the day

A retired corporate executive decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life...until the boat sank! He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day, when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks her, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"

She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you." "Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branch and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." "But, where did you get the tools?" "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable, ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware."

The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few hours of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls out off the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?" "No, no thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I have a still. How about a Pina Colada?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet." No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.


"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?" When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines and flowers strategically positioned, and smelling of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to her!

"Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been out here for a really long time. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for all these months?" She stares into his eyes and takes his hand in hers.


He can't believe what he's hearing. He swallows excitedly, tears start to form in his eyes, and he says,
"You mean, I can check my e-mail from here?"

 

In Spanish Computer Class...
A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

''House'' for instance, is feminine: ''la casa.''

''Pencil,'' however, is masculine: "el lapiz.''

A student asked, ''What gender is 'computer'?''

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether ''computer'' should be a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that "computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender (''la computadora''), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine (''el computador''), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

 

Jake, the rancher, went one day
to fix a distant fence.
The wind was cold and gusty and
the clouds rolled gray and dense,

As he pounded the last nail in
and gathered tools to go.
The temperature had fallen
and the snow began to blow.

When he finally reached his pickup,
he felt a heavy heart,
from the sound of that ignition,
he knew it wouldn't start.

So Jake did what most of us do
if we'd have been there.
He humbly bowed his balding head
and sent aloft a prayer.

As he turned the key for the last time,
he softly cursed his luck.
They found him three days later,
frozen stiff in that old truck.

Now Jake had been around in life
and done his share of roamin'.
But when he saw Heaven,
he was shocked -- it look just like Wyomin'.

Of all the saints in Heaven,
his favorite was St. Peter.
Now, this line, it ain't needed
but it helps with rhyme and meter.

So they set and talked a minute or two,
or maybe it was three,
Nobody was keepin' score --
in Heaven time is free.

"I've always heard," Jake said to Pete,
"that God will answer prayers,
But one time I asked for help,
well He, just plain wasn't there.

Does God answer prayers of some,
and ignores the prayers of others?
That don't seem exactly square --
I know all men are brothers.

Or does he randomly reply,
without good rhyme or reason?
Maybe, it's the time of day,
the weather or the season.

Now I ain't trying to act smart,
it's just the way I feel,
And I was wonderin', could you tell --
what the heck's the deal?

Peter listened very patiently
and when Jake was done,
There were smiles of recognition,
and he said, "So, you're the one!

That day your truck, it wouldn't start,
and you sent your prayer a flying,
You gave us all a real bad time,
with hundreds of us a trying.

A thousand angels rushed to check
the status of your file,
But you know, Jake, we hadn't heard
from you in quite a while

And though all prayers are answered,
and God ain't got no quota,
He didn't recognize your voice,
and started a truck in North Dakota.

Moral of the story:

Pray Early...Pray Often
and buy a good battery.

 

Cat lovers will luv this one ... enjoy.

 

Texas Vs. Australia
A Texan farmer goes to Australia on vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets to talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice that size!"


They walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately replies, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows."


The conversation has died down when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks the Aussie, "What are those?"


The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, "Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas?"

 

Jack was going to be married to Jill, so his father sat him down for a little fireside chat.
"Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants and handed them to your mother, and said, "Here, try these on."
So, she did and said: "These are too big, I can't wear them.'"
So I replied: "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and always will." Ever since that night we have never had any problems."

Jack thought that might be a good thing to try. So on his honeymoon he took off his pants and said to Jill: "Here try these on."
She did and said: "These are too large, they don't fit me."
So Jack said: "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don't want you to ever forget that."

Then Jill removed her pants, handed them to Jack and said: "Here, you try on mine."
He tried and said: "I can't get into your pants."
So she said: "Exactly. And if you don't change your attitude, you never will."

 

Nothing like starting off the morning ROFLMAO!!

Snickering in Secaucus, Silly ed

 

THE SENILITY PRAYER
Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,
the good fortune to run into the ones I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.

 

The first one......no problem

The 2nd..........Always very unlucky

The 3rd..........Now where did I put my glasses?

Did I pass the test?

Fumbling around in Framingham, Fragile ed

 

Yup ..you did good..that calls for a beer..


John was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important
meeting and couldn't find a parking place.

Looking up toward heaven, he said, "Lord, take pity on me. If you find
me a parking place I will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my
life and give up beer."

Just then a parking place miraculously appeared!

John looked up again and said, "Never mind. I found one!"

 

Do you charge extra for a tummy rub.. or does that come after the Marja Relaxation Infusion.

http://www.infusionpad.com/relaxation.html

 

Kid's Instructions on Life...
"Wear a hat when feeding seagulls."

"Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning."

"Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower."

"Never ask for anything that costs more than $5 when your parents are doing taxes."

"Never bug a pregnant mom."

"Don't ever be too full for dessert."

"When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' don't answer him."

"Never tell your mom her diet's not working."

"Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat."

"When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone."

"Never spit when on a roller coaster."

"Never do pranks at a police station."

"Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving."

"Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do."

"Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand."

"Listen to your brain. It has lots of information."

"Stay away from prunes."

"Never dare your little brother to paint the family car."

"Forget the cake, go for the icing."

"Remember the two places you are always welcome - church and Grandma's house."

"When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents."

 

More proof that gasoline prices are out of control:

I pulled into a full service gas station today and asked for five dollars worth of gas.

The guy f*rted, took my five and walked away...

 

Murphy's Laws for Parents"

1. The tennis shoes you must replace today will go on
sale next week.
2. Leakproof thermoses -- will.
3. The chances of a piece of bread falling with the grape jelly
side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
4. The garbage truck will be two doors past your house when
the argument over whose day it is to take out the trash ends.
5. The shirt your child must wear today will be the only one
that needs to be washed or mended.
6. Gym clothes left at school in lockers mildew at a faster
rate than other clothing.
7. The item your child lost, and must have for school within
the next ten seconds, will be found in the last place you look.
8. Sick children recover miraculously when the pediatrician
enters the treatment room.
9. Refrigerated items, used daily, will gravitate toward the
back of the refrigerator.
10. Your chances of being seen by someone you know dramatically
increase if you drive your child to school in your robe and curlers.

 

ADULT :
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing
in the middle.
BEAUTY PARLOR :
A place where women curl up and dye.
CANNIBAL :
Someone who is fed up with people.
CHICKENS :
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are
dead.
COMMITTEE :
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST :
Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST :
Someone me-deep in conversation
GOSSIP :
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.
HANDKERCHIEF :
Cold Storage.
INFLATION :
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MYTH:
A female moth.
MOSQUITO :
An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN :
Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET :
Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON :
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE :
The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW :
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
YAWN :
An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES :
Something other people have. You have character lines.

 

CAT AND MOUSE

Into my house just recently,
My owner brought a new machine,
I've learned to hate it passionately,
And everything it means

I watched her as she set it up,
After all the pieces were unpacked,
She would not let me play at all,
With the cords and wires in its back.
Mouse cords 2

She turned it on; it whirred a bit,
Text appeared upon a screen,
Voices came from little boxes,
And noises, too, from the machine.

She seemed to know what she was doing,
She put a disk into a slot, ,
I jumped up, and she said, "NO,
This is what a cat does NOT!"

Then, quite loudly she cried, "DOWN!"
Quickly pushing me aside,
I saw her staring at the screen,
As if she had been hypnotized.


On a pad next to her hand,
I saw a little mouse,
I was so thrilled to see it,
To think it was welcome in our house.

"State of the art," she said, smiling,
"It is cordless - has no tail,
Operates on batteries,
It cost more, but was on sale."

A tail-less mouse - I was impressed,
I didn't know they came that way,
She gaily pushed it back and forth,
As if she liked the way it played.

She constantly shooed me away,
She would not share her mouse,
I only wished to touch it,
Why was she such a grouch?

But I knew the time would come,
She'd have to leave that darned machine,
And one night, when she'd gone to bed,
I jumped up ... unheard ... unseen


In one big gulp, I got that mouse,
It went down pretty well,
The next day, when she asked for it,
I thought ... oh, no ... I'll never tell.

"Oh, my gosh," she said aloud,
"I just cannot believe this,"
She moved me up and down,
Again the cursor did perceive this.

Every which way that she turned me,
The cursor followed suit,
She knew now where her mouse was,
It was an absolute.

I was in charge; she needed me,
Such a grand feeling that I had,
It would not do her any good ,
To get angry or get mad.

Her computer would not work,
Without some motion from my paw,
I handled all her E-mail,
And web surfing overall.

Then, as cats get rid of fur-balls,
Eventually, I lost the mouse,
But for a while, at least,
I was supreme within my house.

The computer now is back on line,
A new mouse sits on a pad,
It has a cord attached to it,
And the mouse is iron-clad.

 

Rita, I just want to say Thank You for putting smiles on our faces in the morning.

 

hope this doesnt break Wilders' TOS:

-=A Naughty Little Poem=-

She whispered "will it hurt me?"
"Of course not" answered he
"It's a very simple process,
You can rely on me."

She said "I'm very frightened,
I've not had this before.
My friend has had it five times
And said it can be sore."

It was growing rather painful
Tears formed in her eyes
It was hurting quite a bit now
It must have been a size.

"Calm yourself" he whispered
"His face filled with a grin
"Try and open wider
So I can get it in."

"It's coming now" he whispered
"I know" she cried in bliss
Feeling it deep within her now
She said "I am glad I'm having this."

And with a final effort
She gave a frightened shout
He gripped it in anguish
And quickly pulled it out.

She lay back quite contended
Sighed and gave a smile
She said "I'm glad I came now
You made it worth my while."

Now if you read this carefully
The dentist you will find
Is not what you imagined
It's just your dirty mind!!

 

The Gravestone Message
The following caption was found written on a gravestone...
"As I am now, you soon shall be,
So be content to follow me."
Then someone taped the following note on that gravestone...
"To follow you I'm not content,
until I know which way you went!"

 

10 ways to realize you may be to old to Trick or Treat

 

I love this one ,havent laughed so hard in ages!!
http://img161.imageshack.us/img161/523/a3e0a011sn.gif

 

Wisdom For Your Cubicle
1. If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.

2. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

3. Sure, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.

4. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings -- they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

5. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.

6. If at first you don't succeed--try management.

7. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

8. Never quit until you have another job.

9. Hang in there: Retirement is only 30 years away!

10. Go the extra mile--It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.

11. Pride, commitment, teamwork--words we use to get you to work for free.

12. Work: It isn't just for sleeping anymore.

13. There are two kinds of people in life: people who like their jobs, and people who don't work here anymore.

 

"FAMOUS LAST WORDS"


* What does this button do?

* It's probably just a rash.

* Are you sure the power is off?

* Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury, so what of it?

* The odds of that happening have to be a million to one!

* Pull the pin and count to what?

* Which wire was I supposed to cut?

* I wonder where the mother bear is.

* I've seen this done on TV.

* These are the good kind of mushrooms.

* I'll hold it and you light the fuse.

* Let it down slowly.

* Rat poison only kills rats.

* It's strong enough for both of us.

* This doesn't taste right.

* I can make this light before it changes.

* Nice doggie.

* I can do that with my eyes closed.

* I've done this before.

* Well, we've made it this far.

* That's odd.

* You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses on, would you?

* Don't be so superstitious.

* Now watch this.

 

Flies...
A farmer got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding, and the trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer uncomfortable.

Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket, and as he was doing that he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head. The farmer said, "Having some problems with circle flies there, Are Ya?"

The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said--"Well yeah, if that's what they are--I never heard of circle flies." So the farmer says--"Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse."

The trooper says, "Oh," and goes back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute he stops and says, "Hey...wait a minute, are you trying to call me a horses' rear?"

The farmer says, "Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you a horses' rear."

The trooper says, "Well, that's a good thing," and goes back to writing the ticket.

After a long pause, the farmer says, "Hard to fool them flies though."

 

New State Mottos

Alabama: At Least We're not Mississippi

Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!

Arizona: But It's a Dry Heat

Arkansas: Litterasy Ain't Everthing

California: As Seen on TV

Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character

Delaware: We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water

Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia: We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism

Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, Maybe Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good.

Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"

Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn

Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana: We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign.

Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland: A Thinking Man's Delaware

Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan: First Line of Defense From the Canadians

Minnesota: "10,000 Lakes , 10,000,000 Mosquitoes & 1 Wrestler for Governor"

Mississippi: Come Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work

Montana: Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, and Very Little Else

Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada: Whores and Poker!

New Hampshire: Go Away and Leave Us Alone

New Jersey: You Want a ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!

New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York: You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...

North Carolina: Tobacco is a Vegetable

North Dakota: We Really are One of the 50 States!

Ohio: We Wish We Were In Michigan

Oklahoma: Like the Play, only No Singing

Oregon: Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal

Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina: Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender.

South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee: The Educashun State

Texas: Si, Hablo Ingles (Yes, I speak English)

Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont: Yep

Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!

Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia: One Big Happy Family-Really!

Wisconsin: Come Cut Our Cheese


****************************************************************


Science Today

The following quotes are taken from test papers and essays submitted to science and health teachers by junior high, high school, and college students from around the world.

• "When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire."
• "H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water."
• "To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube."
• "When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide."
• "Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state."
• "Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water."
• "Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."
• "Blood flows down one leg and up the other."
• "Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration."
• "The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader."
• "Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."
• "Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire."
• "A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."
• "Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."
• "The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowls, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."
• "The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects."
• "The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana."
• "The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."
• "A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."
• "The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."
• "A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is."
• "Many women believe that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception."
• "Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa."
• "Germinate: To become a naturalized German."
• "Liter: A nest of young puppies."
• "Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat."
• "Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away."
• "Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."
• "Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."
• "Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives."
• "Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative."
• "To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose."
• "For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops."
• "For drowning: Climb on top of the person and move up and down to make artificial perspiration."
• "For fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the hand instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor."
• "For dog bite: put the dog away for several days. If he has not recovered then kill it."
• "For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead."
• "To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."
• "For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat."
• "To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."

****************************************************************


Things I MUST remember as a dog...

1. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
2. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
3. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge, behind the sofa or under the bed.
4. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house.
5. I will not eat the cats' food, before they eat it or after they throw it up.
6. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to get sick.
7. I will not throw up in the car.
8. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
9. "Kitty box crunchies," although they are tasty, are not food.
10. I will not eat any more Kleenex or napkins and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.
11. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
12. I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.
13. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.
14. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside.
15. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.
16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.
17. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are mom and dad's laps.
18. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
19. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for dad's driver's license and car registration.
20. I will not play tug-of-war with dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
21. I will not eat mint flavored dental floss out of the bathroom garbage to avoid having a string hanging out of my butt.
22. I will not use "roll around in the dirt" as an option after just getting a bath.
23. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is not an acceptable way of saying hello.
24. I will not hump on any person's leg just because I thought it was the right thing to do.
25. I will not pass gas in my owners face while sleeping on the pillow next to their head.
26. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.
27. The toilet bowl is not a never-ending water supply and, just because the water is blue, it doesn't mean it is cleaner.
28. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when company is over.
29. Suddenly turning around and smelling my butt can quickly clear a room.
30. The cat is not a squeaky toy so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.