I've got something to say...

Not entirely true my young friend, but I think we all know where you are coming from. My first post on this subject mentioned the word "integrity", responsible people will have it, irresponsible people will not. Words can be powerful, an they can be hurtful, it is those who are self assured who will take no head of them. Those who try an follow the golden rule "do unto others as you would want done unto yourself" are usually the one who are the most happy. It is by this code I try an live. I don't always hit the mark however, but I try. From your current an previous post, I would venture to say this just may be the code you try an follow also.

Thanks
Wildman

 

Yes, I would.

And thanks wildman and CartoonBoy for the advice Much appreciated.

Regards,
Firecat

 

I must say there is has been some cracking advice and excellent rules to base ones life on, but one small thing did occur to me in your original Post....

I think that your life and the ability to build lasting, strong friendships with your Contemporaries, might be somewhat enhanced if you refrained just a little, from 'Snitching' on all and sundry on things that, at your age, should really just pass you by just a little......You are not your Brothers Keeper....I may be wrong here and please accept my sincerest apologies if I'am, but as a matter of instance, would you appreciate someone waiting to 'Blab' on you the moment you did something wrong?.....

Your admirable principles should never be allowed to make you 'Holier than Thou'.......There is far more to life than that, don't allow it to bring you lonliness and misery...........


Cochise,

 

That's true, Firecat, people end up Really Disliking persons who tattle about every little thing that they have said or done.

You could end up being pretty lonely! I believe we are all here to learn about life and to learn 'it' ourselves. You can't learn FOR someone else - so why tell every time they make a mistake, on purpose or not?!?

Plus, people begin to think you can't be trusted - that you will blab anything they say - so they won't get close to you - they will stay away!

I hope you read all this advice more than once, I have learned from this thread too, I have been reminded of some things I had forgot - like you can't control people , but you CAN control your emotions about them. Easy one to forget!

Yes, A LOT of good advice to be read more than once and let it sink into that busy young brain! (Busy older brains will do the same - )

 

Well...you know..that struck me too. While I've been a snitch, its only been so at really important times, i.e. when I think it could get them into real trouble if a higher authority finds out. Its better to get scolded by a lower authority than punished by a higher one..

Anyhow, that STILL makes me a snitch, and therefore, I guess, not a good guy. Well, thanks for the advice guys, its time to change myself I guess

Have a great day

Regards,
Firecat

 

Thanks Spanner, really appreciated. So the best thing to do here is to ignore them and go on with my own path. Am I right?

Regards,
Firecat

 

Again I will use the word "INTEGRITY". This means you know when to do the right thing. It does not mean you're a snitch, it means you know when to be responsible. This is not an easy thing my friend, an many a so called grown up do not set a good example in this area. You alone are the one who has to make the final decision as to what you think is right and what you think is wrong. If you believe you are right, an I mean really believe it, then let no one dissuade you from doing the correct thing. A simple rule, "would I like this done to me"? I don't have all the answers by the way, an I have fallen short many of times, but as I said previously I try.

Thanks
Wildman

 

Yeh, Wildman has a great word there. INTEGRITY It's the base of your strength.

 

Hey, thanks. I have really appreciated the advice I got so far - Thank you

Regards,
Firecat

 

I don't know a real advice for you, but I can tell you what I did...

When I was at a younger age, I had alot of problems... And there was no way to deal with them, because they chased me the whole day... So when I was 15 I joined up the army and had basic trainings first... I really changed from that day on, and when I was 16 I went to Grozny for the first time... After being there 8 month, we got holiday and gone for another 8 months...
Now I've a job with 4 days deskwork and 1 day fieldwork... And people respect me since I've earned 3 medals...

I don't say you've to join up too ofcource, your problems are much different then mine... But I think it's better you just igore those things, it's hard but it can be done... You know better yourself, and you laugh at them when you're all adults when you've got a good job and they eat ****
Heads up, you're gonna be allright

 

I guess I might put it somewhat differently.

Assess the situation before you choose to fight the battle, and choose your battles wisely. We all have a certain amount of goodwill granted to us by others. We all make choices on how to spend this goodwill. Spent it on things that matter and be aware of how you spend it.

You shouldn't feel as though you're the eyes and ears of, for example, the school administration or classroom teachers. They are probably more aware of what's going on than seems apparent - I know I was when I taught at a University.

It's not so much saving your mates from punishment from a higher authority, but preventing them from hurting themselves or others. Let the higher authorities deal with them, but try to keep them from injuring themselves. Sometimes people have to be allowed to make their own mistakes - the difficult balance to strike is keeping everyone safe, but allowing mistakes to be made and learned from. This is true whether you're a supervisor, parent, or teacher. Striking that balance is hard, it's an empirical thing, and you tend to get better at it with age.

Blue

 

I am very thankful for joining Wilders'; there's just so much hope when I'm here!

Thank you all!

Regards,
Firecat

 

Ok... looks like I'm too late to give advice here.

But anyway, since I have a different angle to FC's problems than most people, here it is.

It's not much, it's not from the famous mouths of Napoleon or Caeser who faced Herculean battles, or even from a mature adult.
It comes from a 19 year old, puny kid who's survived long enough mentally, to be of some use to the world, and to himself.

It's from my experience, and from books such as The Art of War

1. The jeering/cheering crowd doesn't matter. It's you who does. [Blackspear's sig is right]
2. You were NOT, repeat NOT a snitch. You acted to satisfy your conscience and your code of ethics, which in my book, makes you a perfect Gentleman. A man of ethics, conviction and honour. It takes guts to stand up to such behaviour from your OWN friends. [Wildman's right. It was INTEGRITY]
3. People hate it when I object on technical grounds too. They hate it when I bring up the issues of National Anthem and National pride. But they accept begrudgingly. As adults, they'll HAVE to conform to the rules .
4. When I say something that someone in my groiup doesn't understand, I go on the offensive befor they make a joke. I convinve them that they're stupid, and it's not my fault that they fail to see the obvious.

Now when I was in 8th grade, I used to think that their was a conspiracy against me [yes, i know! I'm screwed up ] But I quickly learned that I'm not important enough for the kids to unite.
And therein lay two lessons.
A. Kids aren't united until they see an easy target. If I'm not around, they'll pick up other targets.
B. If I'm not important enough for them to take serious action, then I can...
i. rest easy.
ii.plot my own schemes.
Guess what I did

Yes! I know. I'm screwed up.

 

Hmm...no13,

Your explanation seems more to my 'theme'...know what I mean?

Thanks!

Firecat

 

WHAT?
"I'm screwed up."

LOL

 

Yup! Now I keep planning what to retort when somebody tries to bully me!

 

Don't plan so much.
It has to be appear effortless and hence magical (to those poor suckers).

 

Actually I tried out an ignore method today...some bullies lept running their mouth and all I did was ROFL as if someone has said something really strange about those guys...they got angry and went home!

Hehe...

 

A. Brilliant. The "Laughter" and "incredulous look" defenses get you away from such distractions.
B. Go to sleep! Isn't it a schoolday tomorrow?

 

Ahem...I am a late sleeper. That's 'coz I have respiratory problems which increases at night leading to disturbed sleep for quite a while - so I stay awake till I feel sleepy.

 

Then start reading the book in the link above. Swear to God you won't sleep for 68 hours... and even then you'll be subvocalising its lessons as your subconscious tries to deal with massive influx of the trillions of datum entries.
Muahahahaha!

 

NO WAY

 

Ok. At least i quit.
Lator Gater.