Wanted: Admin asst to World Ruler

Discussion in 'ten-forward' started by eyes-open, Apr 24, 2006.

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  1. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    Wanted - Admin asst to World Ruler

    http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e119/andysnaps/thdarkside.gif

    Dear World,

    Due to recent activities on the home front it has come to my attention that the little details that go into making the minutiae of life work, are not so much satisfying as they are irritating, stressful and time consuming.

    Having confirmed this with an on-line character test, it appears that I am most suited to those tasks involving taking on the larger picture. I shall therefore become 'Eyes-Open Emperor of the Universe' with dominion over all things (especially those that like to giggle while shouting out "Ooh you are naughty - that tickles").

    This should all come into effect sometime next week, depending on when the uniform is ready.....Most subjects will notice little difference - the Earth will continue to rotate around the Sun ensuring even tans and I promise to ensure, despite pressure from other Galactic leaders, that an Earth representative continues to win the Miss Universe competition.

    Naturally such a responsibility is bound to generate some paperwork.........also, I'm informed that a monthly newsletter is to be expected.

    Therefore if you feel you have what it takes to apply for the post of 'Admin assistant to World Ruler' - Please apply below enclosing details and any relevant experience.

    http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e119/andysnaps/unattendedkids.jpg

    Additional policy suggestions and cool logo's also welcome.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 24, 2006
  2. Cochise

    Cochise A missed friend

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    Will it be alright if we call you 'Ming'...your Emperorership please.....(Cochise bowing so low he thinks he may have crushed a giblet).....



    Cochise,:cool: Bowing and scraping in Bolivia..(I didn't see it before I stood in it)..
     
  3. ~*Nat*~

    ~*Nat*~ Registered Member

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    Eyes-open as the World Ruler. Cool ! :cool: .....



    (Nat bowing even lower, she thinks her back snapped ).....
     
  4. mikel108

    mikel108 Registered Member

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    Can I be your assistant...NARF!
     

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  5. ~*Nat*~

    ~*Nat*~ Registered Member

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    Yeah Mikel...........
    I can tell you're deeply involved in the politics. ;) ;)

    :D :D :D
     
  6. mikel108

    mikel108 Registered Member

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    Will work for cheese.....wine is always free in politics!
     
  7. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Uh....young e-o,

    The fact that you have descended to the depths of 10F to recruit an Admin says volumes about your cockamamie Empire!

    Thoroughly qualified, Bonkers ed

    Ps....I'm hurt and wounded that you didn't ask me 1st!!
     
  8. TouchuvGrey

    TouchuvGrey Registered Member

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    I'm arrogant, opinionated, and i'll accept bribes ( but not do what i was paid to unless it suits me ) I want very high pay with lots of perks. Other than that i'm totally unqualified. When do i start ?




    Mike
     
  9. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    WOW!!...It appears you have all the qualifications to be riding in Air Force One!

    You got my vote! ....and my other vote....and my....

    Punching ballots in Chad, Miami Vice ed
     
  10. Detox

    Detox Retired Moderator

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    This is not the place for political commentary.
     
  11. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    My dear Empiric entities - let me address a variety of issues raised here:-

    Indeed Cochise - in fact if you're gonna go round crushing the Giblets, who by the way I have always found to be a delightful race of people, it may be best if you don't call me by my real name.....

    Cheers Natty - I was really going for the whole Universe - if a jobs worth doing and all that ...... still it's an excellent start motto wise - I'll order the T-shirts today.

    Cunning Mike. You've clearly peeked at my plans to adapt our factories and create a mice friendly working environment. This is to be my first step towards freeing my loyal followers from the yolk of the workplace. Obviously should my scheme succeed, cheese will become a major currency ...... As evidence of my compassion for all, the 3 blind mice will not be expected to clock in (Time Clocks provided by the Hickory Dickory Dock Corporation).

    Ah yes dear Eddy, the Cockamamie Empire - a confused people, who will unfortunately find themselves blamed for crushing the Giblets. Yeh I know it was actually Cochise that did that - but it turns out he knows Mike, who has amassed a cheese fortune and can now afford to buy these sorts of favours.

    I did ask your 1st. I also asked your 2nd who in turn put me in touch with your 3rd and 4th ........ some of who provided video footage and still images. All of which shows you 3 sheets to the wind and with no one able to account for the said wind.....

    TouchuvGrey - while it's great that you've clearly already got Government experience - I was really hoping to buy people that couldn't be corrupted.......

    This seems like the ravings of a madman bent on the suppression of the democratic idyll .......... So I'll keep Detox on staff in case the mice get out of hand.
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2006
  12. TouchuvGrey

    TouchuvGrey Registered Member

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  13. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Idling in a Democracy, Ostrich ed
     
  14. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    It would seem that the principal reasoning behind my taking on the role of 'Emperor of the Universe with Special Dominion over all things Giggly' has been lost in the fray.

    Please note that I already have people searching the fray so don't bother applying for that position......

    With particular respect to comments already received - it appears that I am yet again becoming bogged down in detail. A quick review of the Galactic Leaders handbook "Wiggleroom is for Wimps" has highlighted both the problem and the solution.

    The problem was to be found in Chapter 3:-

    "Minions with Opinions"

    The solution was to hire a personnel consultant:-

    http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e119/andysnaps/complaintsdept.jpg

    As a caring Emperor I want you to know his door will always be open ........
     
  15. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Oh..pish, tosh, and gosh!!

    Fay Wray was in that fray until she ditched the big monkey in Manhatten! Speaking of "Minions", where has Big Bucky been hiding? I hear that he also was reading the Garlic Leader's Handbook so's he can add to his repitoire. Beans just don't have the same magic for him/her anymore.

    By the way...has everyone wished Big Beckie a Happy B'day. Just in case...it'll be redily available in a couple minutes.

    Doing my part for the Empire, Partly ed

    Ps ... I bow to the Impotentate e-o...our Royal Highnass!!
     
  16. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    Whoa there Eddy buddy - quit with the bowing and concentrate on the scraping - we got the whole bottom of a barrel to uncover - and I figure we're just the folks to do it ....

    Besides which, I don't want anyone down there being all humble and hiding a light under my bushel. Not until I can be certain everything is up to regulation on the fire safety front.
    How, when, and with who you do your part, is really your own affair. However any attempt to describe it as Empire business and subsequently enter a claim for expenses, will result in a swift response from our fraudulent claims dept.

    Pish, Tosh, and Gosh were rationalised in an inter-office shuffle and have been replaced by the better value duo of 'Balderdash & Piffle'.

    I'm committed to creating a World that gets ahead - so do the smart thing and make sure that head isn't yours .......
     
  17. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Oh goody....you've been committed!! We needed a 4th for our whist party. It's a BYOT soiree but fresh baked scones are available in the vending machine. No need to bring your Porti-Pottie cause the Head is just 2 doors down.

    Thinking smartly in my cumberbund, No (expense) account ed
     
  18. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    Hey - what's with the 'Bring Your Own Tea' party stuff ? I'm putting that together with the bean fetish and coming up with Boston........ Is revolution already in the air ? am I to be overthrown so soon ? Will I never get my own parking space ?

    Ah what the heck - sell the cheese, shuffle over and kindly pass the cake. Meanwhile I'll try and recall my new Feed the World posters......

    http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e119/andysnaps/starving.jpg

    Oh what a leader the Empire has lost .....
     
  19. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    The Empire might have dumped it's leader but the Home Whist Team gained a 4th. All we need now is for me to remember where I hid the 5th so's we can get our keepers snockered. Then it's everyone down to the ceement pond where we can frolic w/ Ellie Mae! ...... Woo Hoo!!

    No revolution....just change of plans, Revolting ed
     
  20. TouchuvGrey

    TouchuvGrey Registered Member

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    As the newly named Admin Asst to the World Ruler i would like to announce that we will be accepting contributions for a fund to uncover members of the opposition party accepting bribes ( no member of my party would stoop to such of course ) In the name of Truth in Politics i will clearly state that no more than half of the funds collected will be used by me personally.

    My party's position is clear on this, if you accept a contribution to do something for the contributor and actually do it, that constitues bribery. If on the other hand, you don't do it, that is a contribution, and thereby acceptable.

    Please send all contributions ( cash only ) to my office.

    In the shade of the 3rd palm tree on the left
    Maui Hawaii


    :D
     
  21. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Well...TOG,

    It peers yore grey cells are a mite clouded! As our Admin Head Honcho, young e-o, absconded w/the picayune funds we had from the generous pidgeons farflung fine folk.....we are now in a deficit. As yoo are claiming halfseys....bring all yore cash toot sweet and stick it in the orfice of pump #2 at the closest 7-11. Nothin shady about this deal....trust me!!

    Committed and certified, Certainly ed
     
  22. ~*Nat*~

    ~*Nat*~ Registered Member

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    http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/18.gif Holy moly...my goodness. At least and at last he can't do any more harm.
    I do hope that he will be better VERY SOON so he can take me to Prom. My fingernails have been polished black since about a week ago.
     
  23. TouchuvGrey

    TouchuvGrey Registered Member

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    Thank you Ed for helping me to make my point. This is exactly the sort of corruption that donations are needed to uncover. The need for funds is even more urgent than i thought. The most recent information is that he absconded to Tahiti. As soon as i receive sufficient funds for a First class plane ticket and a 5 star hotel i will be there in hot pursuit.


    Mike :mad:
     
  24. big ed

    big ed Registered Member

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    Ok TUG (formerly TOG),

    Methinks it wud be wiser to wear a suit off the rack. A hot pursuit kinda makes yoo stick out like a sore thumb. As far a making things pointy....I learned that frum the Master, Blackspear, who is always stickin it to sumbuddy.

    As soon as Natties nails are dry we'll put the hammer down and meet yoo in St Looie...Looie

    Suitably suited sensibly, Nearsited ed
     
  25. eyes-open

    eyes-open Registered Member

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    Who knew ? Not only was it a case o' Ellie Mae, but Ellie would and Ellie did - I should have know it was a diversionary tactic !! I'd have been back sooner but I had to fall for it 17 times to be sure.....:p
    Cor blimey Eddy - the very nerve of it. Is some blighter messing in me wardrobe already ?

    Me largesse goes out the window when me smalls goes out the door.

    I'd send TUG to see the auditor downstairs - but I'm not sure the batty gal's entirely clear about her job description :D
     
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