Purchasing a new bird ~Joke~

[dog]

Purchasing a new bird

After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband's attention, he'd just shrug her off with some bored comment.

This went on for many months and the wife was going crazy with boredom. Then one day at a pet store, the wife saw this big, ugly, snorting bird with a hairy chest, powerful hairy forearms, beady eyes and dribble running down the side of its mouth.

The shopkeeper, observing her fascination with the bird, told her it was a special imported "Goony bird" and it had a very peculiar trait. To demonstrate, he exclaimed, "Goony bird! The table!"

Immediately, the Goony bird flew off its perch and with single-minded fury attacked the table and smashed it into a hundred little pieces with its powerful forearms and claws! To demonstrate some more, the shopkeeper said, "Goony bird! The shelf!"

Again the Goony bird turned to the shelf and demolished it in seconds.

"Wow!" said the wife, "If this doesn't attract my husband's attention, nothing will!" So she bought the bird and took it home.

When she entered the house, the husband was, as usual, sprawled on the sofa guzzling beer and watching the game. "Honey!" she exclaimed, "I've got a surprise for you! A Goony bird!"

The husband, in his usual bored tone replied, "Goony Bird, my foot!"

[nadirah]

hahahha! ;D ;D ;D ;D

[MikeBCda]

;D ;D ;D

Be warned, this one's a groaner -- about a different unusual breed, the rarey.

This couple wanted a low-budget pet, and the petshop salesman talked them into buying a cute little bird which he called a rarey which he said could, on admittedly rare occasions, actually talk.

So they took it home and were delighted with it for a while. But they discovered that it grew and grew and grew, until it was eating so much they just couldn't afford to keep it.

Since they lived in high country but near the seashore, they managed to load it into into a wheelbarrow. They got to the edge of the cliffs, overlooking the sea, and the man started to tip the barrow up to dump the bird.

At that point the bird leaned out to look waaaay down, then out at the sea. Then it looked mournfully up at them and said:

(Ready?)

"That's a long way to tip a rarey."